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What a beautiful day. Millions of us are tumblr vintage eroticismposting our Valentine’s Day wishes to loved ones and liking and reacting to many others. It’s like whole world is in love.

But Facebook always takes things too far.

I started noticing some profile photos of couples framed by dual-colored hearts. It’s a nice, if slightly cheesy touch. Then right below one of these photos I saw the Facebook logo and a suggestion: “Update your profile picture with a frame.” To the right of that, in case I didn’t get the message, was a “Try it” button.

People changing their profile pics to mark special days in their own lives or events that touch, sometimes, millions of people, is not unusual. I’m also not a fan.

I find the act of changing a profile picture to something other than yourself confusing. On Twitter, I know people who insist on using a celebrity’s photo or some other random image. What’s wrong with yourself?

On Facebook, we’ve changed our profile pictures for holidays and for terrorist attacks. Remember when everyone featured some form of the French flag, usually by overlaying the three colors on their own face? I got behind this one, too, though I think I changed mine to a drawing of the Eiffel tower with a vertical blue, white and red overlay.

It was a clear sign of solidarity. The gravity of the situation demanded it.

Which may be why I’m even more bothered by the way Facebook coaxes us to change our profiles for the most mundane or silly reasons, a never-ending effort to turn its members into sheep: Hey everyone, let’s all put hearts on our profile photos to show just how in love we are.

First of all, I’m well aware that many people on Facebook are not in love. I bet many hate Valentine’s Day. I can only imagine what they think of Facebook’s suggestion.

This is, obviously, part of a much larger trend. Facebook is always coaxing you to wish people happy birthday, even if you barely know them, and when you see others comply, you feel compelled to do the same. It's an unending font of lame me-too ideas like Friendship anniversaries and Friendship Day, all designed to get its 1.8 billion members all moving in the same direction.

I am not immune to these ploys. When I saw the dancing friend monster, its body and limbs comprised entirely of friend images culled from my own feed, I felt like I was watching a dancing algorithm. The friends it chose were not my most important, nor was it particularly inclusive. It was the Facebook brain using all its signals to guess at who belonged in the body, the head, and the undulating arms and legs.

I hated it, and yet I posted it.

I did it not because I’m entertained, but because I’m weak. Not sharing these engagement ploys makes me feel like a spoilsport.

Which brings me back to Tuesday’s blatant attempt to manipulate my very real feelings of love and companionship with my wife. I posted something this morning, a Valentine intended to make her smile, maybe even laugh. It was my own photo, my own thoughts. Why would I want to take what is essentially a boilerplate stamp and put it on top of our photo? Can’t people tell we’re in love without it? Why would I want it to look like everyone else’s declaration of love?

Like I said, reading through everyone’s personal stories of love and companionship is deeply moving, but if every photo I saw had a hint of similarity brought to you by Facebook, I’d feel a little less moved. It’s like the difference between handing someone a Hallmark Card with just the pre-printed words in it and writing a personal message yourself.

In recent years, Facebook has, thankfully, tried to help us vary our social media sentiments. The ability to “Like” “Love,” “Laugh,” say “Wow,” show “Sadness” or even “Anger,” was a big leap forward for Facebook and its users, an acknowledgment that we could feel differently about the same post. The reality is, though, most of us still feel compelled to follow the sentiments of others. If everyone thinks a post is sad, will you be the one to laugh about it? Of course not.

I’m not recommending we all get off of Facebook and other social media this Valentine’s Day, I’m simply warning against falling for its tendency to homogenize everything, from love and happiness to grief and sadness.

Keep posting your love stories, but tell Facebook to keep its Valentine's Day frames to itself.