【Omnibus  Archives】

Teaching is Omnibus  Archivestruly an under-appreciated profession. For the majority of a year, they spend a majority of their time with kids and teens, attempting to not only give them the knowledge they'll need to be successful but also trying to guide them into becoming generally good people.

And if that isn't difficult enough, they have to do all that in the middle of a world of ridiculousness, wading through fidget spinners and patiently waiting for things like the thumb breaking challenge (why would you even) to end. Honestly, they spend so long with kids that they sometimes forget how regular adult interactions even go.

SEE ALSO: We, your child's school, regret banning fidget spinners after seeing what toy came next

So teachers everywhere deserve more than just an apple or a box of chocolates. They could do without the last-minute Hallmark card or the flowers that will inevitably wilt in a week.

Here are what teachers everywhere really want for Teacher Appreciation Day:

The gift of students actually listening quietly for five minutes in a row.

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Honestly, the attention span of the younger generation is truly astounding these days. If we aren't a cute cat crawling into a box that takes no more than a minute and 30 seconds, we've lost you. Since teachers will never be cute cats crawling into boxes, we just ask for one pure moment where you let us explain all the directions for an assignment without interrupting and without needing me to repeat the directions ten times because you weren't actually paying attention.

The gift of remembering that yes, there's a test today.

Please. Just once. "Oh wait, there's a test today?" is a question that haunts us in our nightmares.

The gift of everyone having a pencil because you've asked us for one so many times we don't have anymore.

What do you think we are, made of pencils? Keeping track of your stuff and figuring out a solution to it if you don't are also life skills students should be working on.

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The gift of no student body odor.

This one is for all you teens and tweens out there who haven't yet realized the stifling power of a room full of smells. It's unpleasant. Don't ask if you need to wear deodorant. Just do it.

The gift of a non-working lunch that's longer than 15 minutes.

Via Giphy

Those TV shows and movies that show teachers chilling in the teacher's lounge are not inaccurate but they are farfetched. To think that teachers have time to routinely do nothing but eat and chat with each other is to live in a fantasy world. There are photocopies to make, packets to print, lesson plans to write, parents to call, and if we do find ourselves with "spare time" we use it to get ahead on grading. Lunch becomes just another thing on the to-do list, so we check it off as we attempt to do everything else.

The gift of just a tiny bit of sunlight hitting our face during the winter.

Winter is tough, and it's not just the cold. Thanks to the sun and Daylight Savings, during the winter months, teachers get to school when it's still dark and leave school when it's back to being dark. It's basically just dark all the time, and that really takes a toll on both your mood and soul.

If we could just get a tiny big of sunlight, just a little hitting our face...

The gift of, just once, waking up at a reasonable hour for work.

To think that so many people in the world don't have to get into the office until 9 a.m. That seems downright luxurious to those of us who have to wake up at 5:45 in order to get to school by 7:00 in order to be ready for students to start coming in at 7:45.

The gift of wine. Just have your parents get us wine.

Via Giphy

We know this sounds inappropriate, but it's the unfiltered truth. Sure, we like the $20 Starbucks gift card because coffee is literally what helps us speak coherently during first period. But what we like even more than coffee is wine.

Wine is what gets us through a tough day when we got yelled at by multiple students, wine is what makes things seem hopeful after everyone failed our midterm, wine is basically life. So maybe just have your parents swing by and drop off a bottle at the same time when they drop you off.

The gift of using that strategy we taught you, because literally nothing could make us happier.

It's the moment that every teacher lives for. Your students are taking a test, you're walking around monitoring them, and you see it. Your students are using the strategy that you taught them. It could be the T-chart method you use to keep track of the information in a math problem. It could be the underlining and circling technique that helps you parse through a literature passage.

Whatever it is, it's the strategy that you taught them and you can't help but swell with pride. Your students are learning, despite what you might have thought. Their brains are expanding and they are going to be successful, and you played a part in making that happen.

Way to go, teachers. We appreciate you.

Via Giphy

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